Tuesday, February 3, 1981

Contradictions

Nothing really happened, but I struggled with that old familiar feeling of conflicting emotions; that’s the only way I know how to describe it. I arranged to go to Lee’s house on Sunday with everyone else. Claire asked me if I’d call round for her and show her where Lee lives because otherwise “I’d have to go on my own and I don’t want to.” I live for these little comments. Pathetic. Later on, I was frustrated to hear that Lee’s Mum will only allow four of us at a time in her house.

Nothing else happened worth writing about. When I got home after Art College at half-six, I felt really weary, and slept in the chair all evening. The News sickened me; I'm filled with feelings of helplessness and desperation when I hear that Reagan’s lot want to start up the Neutron Bomb again or when one of his advisors says that the US is considering bringing in castration for rapists!!!! Civilisation’s a wonderful thing!

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